Girl you know it's, yes you know it's, true

So I have this new thing where I can't commit to doing anything, b/c in my mind, this will eliminate any kind of flaking on my part.  This is f*cked up.  It makes me seem like some kind of diva who just has too many options (not my intention).  I end up being very vague, using words like "maybe" and "we'll see".   In reality, I never have plans.  When options do arise, it's after 3 weeks of social drought and everything falls on one night.  Why does it always happen this way?  I guess there are worse things in the world that can happen- like murder.  Oh...that took a turn for the worse.  As for this weekend, looks like I'm either going to Karoke in Culver City or drinking in Silverlake.  I love Karoke, I do...but I have to be in the Karoke mood.  Maybe the problem is that last time I "performed", at a bar called the Brass Monkey,  I sang  "Girl you know it's true" by Milli Vanilli after downing one too many rum and cokes....and the crowd looked at me like I was maming a small child.  Sadly, this was the second time I had performed this song...first time was at the place in Culver City- a little neighborhood bar filled with sketchy locals + me and my friends.  Of course, I suck at singing, I sound like a manitee being raped (whatever that sounds like...what's with the similes today?), but with Alisa, Ashley, and myself kicking it old school to the MV- well, let's just say best. performance. ever.  Okay, the whole point of this is, maybe it's the bad experience last time that has scarred me from karoke- but hopefully not for life.  Actually, the whole point was what I'm  going to do Friday.  You know, I can't make the decision now.  To wrap this up, I'm ending where I started...indecisive and unable to commit.  But at least I can't flake out.
Reagan